The story of the raining fire

Where did they come from? why are they here? will they ever stop? I have a feeling im going to die tonight.
The char are ruthles pigs who devoured my mother and father. All my family vanished off the face of this desalin wasteland I used to call Asclon City. But when I ran out of the gates riped off their hinges by the brute char a sign said
"æßÖăöĿŦ ŶijƏǼ" which i later found out to say Hope is lost.

My name is Devona. I was born near a small village by ashford called rin. My parents were extremly devolped Warriors serving as enlisted warriors in Captain calhans army to save the great wall. They came home one day to say they will be gone for a while. They found DNA results of Firetooth burnclaw, a char bandit that rampaged over wizards folly. But they didnt know thoose monsters had a army of slbbering far ugly slobs! As entering the lair of Firetooth a ataxe apeard slaying everyone on sight. One day i hope to find that cave and vanquish that horrbile creature forever.

2 years have past and i found shelter in the new asclon city which used to be the acdemy....It coulnt be used anymore. I fed off larva of mardula wurms close cousins of the ones that now capture heros in elona. I lived in my old tent i was born in......Or at least what was left of it. I only had my armor my hammer and a old photo of my parents before they left for the trip on what i call Dooms encounter.

Finally after 9 months of hopless days I had a vistor. A young girl. She said her name was gwen.



To be continued......

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I like what you are trying to do but...

Rin is not a small village! It is the capital city of the kingdom of Ascalon!

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She said her name was gwen. She had a cracked flute in her hand filled with dirt and must and a ripped small cape on her back. "I know who you are, Your Devona. Some travlers braught me to you for a few minutes that i was following" I thought for a second and rebudled "Hmmm I think I rember you! What do you want anyway?" i said. She repplied with I have had a past with fire and death and I Know you can confront the table in temple of ages where the 5 gods rest there feet." I thought and told her that I was weak latley and couldnt do it.

As she walked out in dissapoitmeant a single red iris flower droped from her cloak. I walked outside to give her the flower but she was gone.....I followed her footprints but they seemed to vanished as i got farther into sardelic satrium. They stoped before the catacums.

Nice one G man, but you can't spell...it's catacombs, not catacum. And how the heck would guys who lived in the swords and arrows time do DNA tests?

Nice story line.. But where do you come from or whats your primary language, cause I can see that english is not your stronger one :P Anyways, thats really good, keep it up.

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The catacomes were dark desalin rooms where evil lurked and darkness slumbered....Now It was frightening enough to bring tears to the 5 true gods. I walked in calling her name "GWEN! GWEN! THIS IS NO PLACE FOR A CHILD YOU CAN GET KILLED!" I was terrbiley scared for the young girl I dont want anything to happen to her.

That was when it happened.....When the portal appeared. Infront of me a huge red portal larger then balthazars blade. Lightnig crackled and thunder boomed. Then out of the portal A single hand came out to grab me that I would soon find out belonged to the dark lord abbadon!

It brough me into the portal. When I emerged I saw a small figure...IT LOOKED LIKE GWEN! I ran over to hug her so releaved that she was alive. But when i turned her around.....It wasnt gwen.

Ok where was I O isee....

It wasnt gwen. It was the forbiden one. The weaver of nightmares and creater of darnkess. It was Abbadon. But what was astonishing was it was gwen with the head of abbadon. He/she had 6 eyes three on each side with flames in each of them and rotten tenacles from the scalp whiped devone into a long long slumber.

She awoke back in her tent in which gwen had visited in the begging of the story. She though she just had a terrible nightmare......But she knew it wasnt her head felt like a thousand hammers had fallen upon her head. She felt with and nubm. She limped from the corner and to the rip where she used as a window. Outside was something unforgettable..........In a bad way.

Ok I'm toatally lost...you need to make this a bit more clearer and a bit less jumbled. Shes in the catacombs then shes in the tent and shes telling about 2 years of dreams in a dream that was real but turned out to be a dream...what???

Your story is so wrong at so many sides. It's a great comedy!

I officially award this story with The Medal of Humiliation, Dishonor, and Confusion.

Touching, compelling, epic.

A true masterpiece.

You people obviously don't know real art when you see it.