Class Stereotypes

Okay, let's have some fun here. We all hear about how Warrior's are the dumbest profession... so what are the other stereotypes then? Keep them to the form of: (these are just for illustration purposes)

Warriors = Dumbest
Monks = Whiniest
Necros = Least likely to procreate with another human being
Eles = Most likely to be compensating for something
Rangers = most cowardly. "Look at me, I have 5 running stances"
Dervish = "I am invincible. Cower beneath as I hurl pebbles!"
Assassin = Thinks he/she could 1v1 an aircraft carrier
Rits = 1 trick spamming pony
Paragon = Was that guy in highschool who tried too hard to make friends and was never invited to the party... will likely grow up to be a mutiny victim
Mesmers = Elitist / Barry Manilow fan
...And so forth.

No flaming - we just want to have a little fun/humour here are our own expense.

Warriors: wammos
Monks: complain to much
Eles: fire only
Mesmer: weakest class only interupt
Assassins: nobody wants them in group

all i hear so far

Paragons: WTF LAME....WTF hoh hax -_-
Monks: whiners
Eles: original as my foot
mesmer: as fun as my foot
Ranger: as strong as the mesmers foot
Assassin: ONLY SPIKE
Dervish: Grenth...melandru...
ritualist: Takes no skill

well actually I guess every class has teh ele stereotype. and most classes want to do the sin stereotype....and everyone does the monk thing.

Rangers: hippies
Elementalists: sluts and/or emos
Warriors: wanna be gangsters
Assassins: narutards
Monks: elitist
Dervish: new whammos
Paragon: useless
Ritualists: takes no skill/extinct
Mesmers: sexy and sophisticated
Necros: Flesh Golem+Ghials Staff corpse screwer

Assassin: Leerooooooooy->splut->ZOMG HEAL ME NOOB
Elementalist: Do you actually play this game or do you just stand around dancing naked?
Monk: Gimme 5k or I won't heal any of you anymore
Necromancer: Never lonely, gotta give em that
Mesmer: Now where do all these purple icons come from and who is the guy in the funny suit?
Warrior: I have mending on me!
Ritualist: I botched up the Monking School
Dervish: Why don't we have an avatar of GW Bush? THAT would be overpowered brainless pressure!
Ranger: Dude take a shower, theres plants in you hair!
Paragon: DRAT! incoming doesnt work against nerf bats, they still do double damage

Mesmers: F**king annoying leprachauns
Necros: Subcontracting corporate wh0res
Monks: Arse-licking do-gooders
Warriors: Common-as-muck meat-shields
Rangers: Filthy tree-hugging feral monkeys
Elementalists: One-hit-wand'ers (excuse the pun)
Ritualists: Disgusting, writhing freaks
Dervishes: Shameless Zasalamel rip-offs (see Soul Calibur 3 for proof)
Paragons: Back-seat drivers


... Assassins: Awesome (I cannot speak out against my primary class). =P

Rits: Only useful as Spirit Spammers. Nukers > Channeling, Monks > Resto, Necro MMs > Minion Bombing *Finally decides to give up and make a Monk, where they release their hidden Rit frustrations by whining.*
Assassins: Rez please?
Monks: Do what I say, or I don't heal you. /ragequit *Goes back to 55 farming.*
Nukers (There are no other kinds of Ele, you understand): Meteor Swarm LOL!
Warriors: I don't have Mending, what do you think I am, a noob? I have HEALING SEED. /coughblushcough
Dervish: LFG anything! PLEASE! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, LFG! Oh, you already got 3 of us in your group, sorry to be a bother... ... ... LFG...
Necro: *MM for most of game.* SS or SV? SS... SV... OMG, I can't decide! /sob *Is invited to Gate of Madnesss anyways.*
Paragon: *Poor for most of game.* Secondary... secondary... OMG, I can't decide! /sob *Is never invited to anything.*
Rangers: STFU, I'm pulling already! GAWD! *Gets no love for rest of battle if successful, and is blamed/perma-ignored if he fails.*
Mesmer: Yes, I interrupt... /sigh *Uploads his non-IW templates.*

More humor, from the NPCs:
Shiro: lawl, I pwn all of you, regardless.
Lich: lawl, you will all die when I get my hands on- *Dies first.*
Abaddon: Lawl, I will pwn the 5 Godz! *Dies in 20 minutes or less.*
Gehraz: lawl, me > Melonni
Melonni: /cry /wrist
Kormir: I'm blind, yet I carry a spear. I do nothing and draw no aggro. Yet somehow, I get to be a GOD. lawl. Thanks, you chumps!
Margrid: Damn, she got the BEST DEAL EVAR. /cry /wrist
Mhenlo: Is it just me, or are we out of jobs now?
Khim: Yeah, seriously. Go fish. Got any... Aces?

Warriors = Dodge Ram. Big and powerful. Falls apart in a year.
Monks = Toyota Prius. Helpful to our enviroment. Couldn't survive a light poll.
Necros = Porsche 911. Performs well. But never changes.
Eles = Hyundai Sonata. Good value. Everyone has one.
Rangers = Land Rover Range Rover. Resilient in the outdoors. But no one wants one.
Dervish = BMW M5. Plenty of gadgets. But you hardly use half of them.
Assassin = Honda Civic. All show. But no go.
Rits = Volvo V50. Resourceful. But unloved.
Paragon = Chevorlet Corvette Z06. Nice to have. But not for daily driving.
Mesmers = Cadillac CTS. Look at me styling. But few are bought.

Can paragons even get a stereotype other then Full paragon team or crap?

Heh... some of these are pretty good

Okay... now for a corporate analogy. This one applies to heavy industry (mining, steel, cement, oil, etc) and probably elsewhere:

Warriors = Production. Big, fast, and dumb. Always looking for something bigger and badder. Commonly heard saying "I can tweak this valve with my hammer. THUMP!"
Monks = Maintenance. The fix-it people. They generally care only about themselves until something's died. You need to suck-up to these people to get what you need. Commonly heard saying "Hey, who hit this with a hammer?"
Necros = Marketing group. Pretty much set up with Warrior/Production hate. Anything they do will likely leave you cursed. Primary attribute is Sale Reaping
Rangers = Front-line Supervisors. Good at everything but excel at nothing.
Eles = Engineering. Converting raw materials and energy. Always want to have the biggest bang. Can specialize in Electrical/pneumatics, Mining/materials, combustion/chemistry, hydraulics, etc
Mesmers (Domination) = your boss'es boss'es boss. No matter what you do with this guy you're screwed
Mesmer (Illusion) = that guy your boss'es boss promoted. All show, no substance
Mesmer (Inspiration) = stupid noob. Inspiration doesn't exist in a corporate environment
Assassins = Management. They barge in, cause chaos, havoc, and disorder and then flee without accomplishing much
Rits = Quality Control. "We're here to annoy you".
Paragon = HR. Say a whole lot but do nothing value added.
Dervish = Accounting. You just can't get rid of these guys no matter how hard you try.

this thread has some great humor regarding class look alikes
http://www.guildwarsguru.com/forum/s...ght=look+alike

Wow. These are really good!!!

<--- Me playing Guild Wars when I am in a group of people where those stereotypes are true. LOL

Warriors - Dumb tankers. "FOLLOW MY TARGETS NO ONE ELSE"
Rangers - TRAP OR DIE! "Pull now! BARRAGE FTW ZOMG!"
Mesmers - Don't even see mesmers much lol... DOMINATION MAGIC
Assassins - NARUTARDS. RUSH IN then yell for HEAL. "I'll be the next Hokage i swear!"
Paragon - Support only plox. [email protected] who wear skirts. "Be sure to have GFTE!
Necromancers - SS/SV/MM NAO! Emos.
Elementalists - Spikers! I only use fire skills PRO! Water is noob!
Ritualists - WHAT SPIRITS? You suck at healing! You suck at support! You suck at lightning spiking! (Even though they don't at all 3 lol).
Monk - HEAL ME NAO! *Warrior/Sin dies* OMG YOU SUCK MONK.
Dervish - FOR GOD'S SAKE (pun since they use the power of the 5 gods haha) SOMEONE ADD ME TO PARTY!

monk--"monk for hire: 1k per person"
assassin--"but i have survivor title!"
warrior--"dont worry, heal sig will keep me alive"
dervish--"LFG......LFG.....LFG....LFG"
paragon--"hey come on guys! im good!"
ritualist--hmm...cant think of a good one =P
elementalist--"water magic?"
mesmer--"im better than everyone because i am the master class"
ranger--"b/p lfg"
necromancer--"mm lfg" *while waiting to fight shiro in cantha*

Assassin - Look at me, I'm so badass, *omfg im blind,omfg spoil victor, dies*
Dervish - I can tank!!! I have avatar of balthazar!! take me in FoW!!
Elementalist- I spam flare and sucky sucky 5 dolla
Mesmer - Heh, I am the most useful class in the group yet no one takes me, scrubs... Maybe I should explain why am I useful to new players
Monk - If anyone comments my healing breeze I rage quit and find another group because I am god
Necromancer - BiP, SS, MM, SV, etc lfg, I can play anything but don't have any runes so my spells suck, I also don't know what energy management is and am probably going to kill myself with BiP
Paragon - I'm so hot... beautiful, just take me already
Ranger - I have barrage, apply poison and firestorm!!!
Ritualist - Mmm, Where should I spirit spam...
Warrior - This mission is timed!!! I have to run ahead, don't heal me, I have healing breeze.

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Warrior:
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