Advice Please

Could someone please crit this picture I'm working on. I'm struggling especially with the large portion of hair which has the wrong look of depth and anything else that could be improved. Thank you.

Don't be afraid of making lines in the hair. If you're uncertain about them; draw them on a separate layer and try out. Hair consists of several small bangs. Study on real people/pictures how it usually bemds and curls. Don't be afraid to draw separate hairs and spaces in between bangs. Putting hair in motion will make the hairs separate and fly a litte differently.

The hair didn't really strike me as being out of place or anything, I kind of like it. The way you have it now it gives it a glossy look, but I can see what the previous poster means by adding more detail, I suppose the bottom peice could use some. Something that sticks out to me are the detail lines you drew on the stomach, don't really know how to describe it but they just kind of turn me off, makes it look like a she has a gut or strong abs, nothing wrong with that, but I don't know if that's the look you are going for. Something I notice is that her left side (where her tummy is exposed) angles up kind of awkwardly, if you follow the angle, it doesn't really match what you think would be underneath the shirt. I think it needs to come in a little bit more, not curve out so much. Also, something I notice when I checked proportions is that the arms seem too short, although honestly when I look at the image as a whole they don't stick out as awkward what so ever, I think it has to do with the characterture nature of the art style, trying to emphasize the legs and the head. All in all, very impressive, you are doing great!

Aha yes it looks like she has a pot belly hehe. I'll try to look at these things. The thing with the hair is to me it looks like the large part at the back is getting closer to her because of the way I did the shadow but if I add more lines like GeminiJuSa said, to each side it may start to look curled inwards....Atleast I hope. Thanks for the opinions they're very helpful.

are the arms bent? the elbow should come down to just above the belly button if its not bent. also you need to show that the arm is moved back a bit by the placement of the shadows. the way you have it now its impossible to see that because the placement of the shadows just seems sort of random. You should try to depict more clearly where your lightsource is coming from.

the left side of her face (our left) looks fatter than it really is because you've made the hair there thick as well.. if you want it to look more balance then you can simply make the hair thinner.

neck is too thick/long

where your legs end we should actually start seeing the bend of the knee, i think its because i dont see that the legs look a bit disembodied

also, since her head is slightly turned the width of her left eye (our left) should be thinner than the right.

bah I'm better off starting a new one lol

Arms look very abnormal, not an expert on figure so I can't give you specific ideas on how to fix it, sorry.

Although the left arm (our left) isn't finished yet. I just left it black for now.

Talania, I pretty much have the same problems you're having in terms of wanting to do a full complete piece but having it not look right as I move along with it. I don't have much advice except to make sure you just do a lineart-type piece first, make sure its PERFECT and then try moving from there.

ysj

I've started on trying to improve a few things. Working on the Hair and Neck at the moment. Now she has a fat face haha. Excuse I haven't done the shadows or highlights just working on general shape for now.

I think making the right arm longer wont be too hard as I can make the stick completely straight that way the arm will have to be longer to reach it. Then if I shadow the left arm to show that its bent hopefully things will be much better *fingers crossed*

Also I think it might help if I have the garter further up the leg just so its partially obscured by the skirt but I am noob in photoshop and was wondering if anyone knows how I can rotate just the garter so that I can have the more detailed top part down the bottom...I dont really want to redo that part hehe. Thanks.

http://i939.photobucket.com/albums/a...k_182/WIP9.jpg

On this one I added more hair and moved the face/chin inline with the neck

http://i939.photobucket.com/albums/a..._182/wip10.jpg