Drink Troll Unguent Classic!

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Devil's Dictionary
Devil's Dictionary
Wilds Pathfinder
#1
We had a short discussion on the IRC concerning whether Troll Uguent is for trolls or from trolls.
I thought about and came out with this:


Note: This image is five days old but I believe this sub-forum needs submissions to encourage others.
William of Orange
William of Orange
Krytan Explorer
#2
Looks delicious, think maybe they're selling some on eBay?

Nice work with the picture by the way, but I'm not sure if I'd rather have it be from trolls. Just paints a bad picture in my mind of what's going into it, since trolls don't seem like the cleanliest of creatures. But then again, I'm not very good friends with any trolls either...
William the Silent
William the Silent
Academy Page
#3
Ahh, do not rush to judgement, Sir William. For the troll unguent is commonly referred to as "the elixir of the gods" though most greeks would disagree. When something so sacred comes upon you you must realize that the end justifies the means. Sure, you may be drinking troll feces with fresh liquid from the urinary tract but in a few minutes you will have the ambient light of Zeus and the strength of Hercules! (on that note, I'll take six).
William of Orange
William of Orange
Krytan Explorer
#4
Quote: Originally Posted by William the Silent
Ahh, do not rush to judgement, Sir William. For the troll unguent is commonly referred to as "the elixir of the gods" though most greeks would disagree. When something so sacred comes upon you you must realize that the end justifies the means. Sure, you may be drinking troll feces with fresh liquid from the urinary tract but in a few minutes you will have the ambient light of Zeus and the strength of Hercules! (on that note, I'll take six). Actually, you'll have a health regeneration of +3-9 for 10 seconds, but I guess it's close...? Nice visual though.
William the Silent
William the Silent
Academy Page
#5
So I exaggerated, big deal! Marketability is all about hyperbole! You don't see Voltaire writing about a society that needs a little bit of improvement with a government that's kind of not really totally doing the right thing now do you??? You don't see McDonald's saying that their burgers have the off ingredients of a kind of resemblance of a hybrid of a Macedonian cow now do you??? I thought not.
Tur713
Tur713
Krytan Explorer
#6
Break out the Troll Uguent and the Ambrosia! We're eating like GODS tonight!
...
But not like Promethius...I think he only gets eaten...I'm thinkin' more like Zeus...and Dyonisus. Is is bad to mix wine and troll urguent?
Dreamsmith
Dreamsmith
Elite Guru
#7
Quote: Originally Posted by Tur713
Is is bad to mix wine and troll urguent? I believe that's what Apuleius tried, after which he wrote, "I approached the boundary of death, and treading upon Proserpine's threshold, I was carried through all the elements; after which I returned. At dead of night I saw the sun flashing with bright effulgence; I approached close to the gods above and the gods below and I worshipped them face to face."
Uthar
Uthar
Banned
#8
Quote: Originally Posted by Dreamsmith
I believe that's what Apuleius tried, after which he wrote, "I approached the boundary of death, and treading upon Proserpine's threshold, I was carried through all the elements; after which I returned. At dead of night I saw the sun flashing with bright effulgence; I approached close to the gods above and the gods below and I worshipped them face to face." So in other words, 'friends don't let friends drink both Troll Unguent and Wine in close succession.'

And, returning vaguely to the topic at hand or something, the image is good. The one droplet kind of impedes readability, but I suppose we can live.
Dreamsmith
Dreamsmith
Elite Guru
#9
Quote: Originally Posted by Uthar
So in other words, 'friends don't let friends drink both Troll Unguent and Wine in close succession.' Not without a sitter in any case...
Wraith_2005
Wraith_2005
Pre-Searing Cadet
#10
Quote: Originally Posted by William the Silent
Ahh, do not rush to judgement, Sir William. For the troll unguent is commonly referred to as "the elixir of the gods" though most greeks would disagree. When something so sacred comes upon you you must realize that the end justifies the means. Sure, you may be drinking troll feces with fresh liquid from the urinary tract but in a few minutes you will have the ambient light of Zeus and the strength of Hercules! (on that note, I'll take six). roflmao!!

I love the pic...nicely done
Ti-Ben
Ti-Ben
Elite Guru
#11
Hmm Troll Unguent, tasty. Looks like Slurm. I'd drink that everyday.
Nash
Nash
Wilds Pathfinder
#12
Trolls use Troll Unguent, so I doubt it's made out of Troll bodyparts.
William the Silent
William the Silent
Academy Page
#13
We aren't talking about troll body parts we're talking about troll excretions!
Nash
Nash
Wilds Pathfinder
#14
Somehow I doubt even trolls would drink their own excrement.
Tur713
Tur713
Krytan Explorer
#15
I don't know why, but I'd expect it to taste something like Jolt... Heh, that would be great if it did... and if it exist so that I may drink it...


...Or I could just go get some Jolt...
Devil's Dictionary
Devil's Dictionary
Wilds Pathfinder
#16
Quote: Originally Posted by Nash
Trolls use Troll Unguent, so I doubt it's made out of Troll bodyparts. What makes you so sure ?
T
Taranis
Lion's Arch Merchant
#17
This thread makes me not wanna use this skill anymore....hoenestly..poor Ranger...
William of Orange
William of Orange
Krytan Explorer
#18
troll
n.
A supernatural creature of Scandinavian folklore, variously portrayed as a friendly or mischievous dwarf or as a giant, that lives in caves, in the hills, or under bridges.

un·guent (nggwnt)
n.

A soothing or medicinal salve

I know I've kind of touched on this before, but I still have no idea how the two go together. And I have no idea whether or not to think it's made from some part of a troll, or just for trolls. But if it were for trolls, then why would Rangers be drinking it, unless.....







....Rangers are trolls!!!! It's a conspiracy I tell you!
S
Scaper-X
Frost Gate Guardian
#19
Quote: Originally Posted by Ti-Ben
Looks like Slurm. It /does/ look like Slurm.

And I'm of the thinking that it's probably a natural troll ability, making the unguent (ointment). Therefore, it'd be /from/ the trolls. And used by them.

And us. Eww.
-- Scaper-X
L
Lansing Kai Don
Banned
#20
Quote: Originally Posted by William of Orange
troll
n.
A supernatural creature of Scandinavian folklore, variously portrayed as a friendly or mischievous dwarf or as a giant, that lives in caves, in the hills, or under bridges.

un·guent (nggwnt)
n.

A soothing or medicinal salve

I know I've kind of touched on this before, but I still have no idea how the two go together. And I have no idea whether or not to think it's made from some part of a troll, or just for trolls. But if it were for trolls, then why would Rangers be drinking it, unless..... I believe that troll unguent is merely the medical salve trolls use on themselves. For instance, lets say a particularly smart bear breed gets hurt, but they have a substance made out of mud and certain insects they put on their wounds to keep them from being infected. To the "bears" this would have some important name to them like Neosporin, but to the human race we would merely call it bear unguent or bear salve... because of where it's origins are from and where we see it used the most.



Lansing Kai Don