A bit of poetry.

Claire Wolf

Krytan Explorer

Join Date: Aug 2005

The Zephyr Of Tyria [tZoT]

17 Dec 2005 at 02:25 - 1

Shimus DarkRaven

Desert Nomad

Join Date: Oct 2005

Titusville, PA <nowhere>

KOD <Knights of the Dragonrose><Guild Officer>

W/Mo

17 Dec 2005 at 02:46 - 2

Makes me feel like I'm a bladedancer. Keep it up! <sching sching blocking arrows>

--The Shim

coolyguy

Desert Nomad

Join Date: Jun 2005

[bizR] 'Bizarre Monastery`.

17 Dec 2005 at 04:08 - 3

/clap that's really good.

Storm Crow

Desert Nomad

Join Date: Jul 2005

With Vanatiel by the Lion's Arch Lighthouse, waiting for the storm with which we are accoustomed

Children of the Order [CoO] -True Heroes Fight to Keep the Balance-

17 Dec 2005 at 04:09 - 4

good wording, your syllable matching is a *little* off tho...=/.....mind if I change it a little?

original:
Quote:

Originally Posted by Claire Wolf

The Sword and the Arrow

Meet thy sword, with thy arrow,
Quickly, fly like a sparrow,
Hurry, go before it's too late,
For we cannot wait~

The sword approaches, the arrows fly,
The word is screamed, people try,
Tears fall, blood is shed,
Fear grows, hate is spread~

Help us all, or we may fall,
Hear our call, before its the end of us all,
Do not run, do not fear,
For the sword and arrow are near~ new version:

The Sword and the Arrow

Meet thy sword, with thy arrow,
Quickly, fly like a sparrow,
Hurry, go 'fore it's too late,
Go now, for we cannot wait~

The sword approaches, arrows fly,
The word is screamed, and people try,
Tears they fall, and blood is shed,
Fear grows hastily, hate is spread~

Help us Gods, or we may fall,
Hear our call, before it ends us all,
Do not run, and do not fear,
For the sword and arrow, they are near~

kkthxbye

Claire Wolf

Krytan Explorer

Join Date: Aug 2005

The Zephyr Of Tyria [tZoT]

17 Dec 2005 at 05:32 - 5

Quote:

Originally Posted by Storm Crow

good wording, your syllable matching is a *little* off tho...=/.....mind if I change it a little?

original:

new version:

The Sword and the Arrow

Meet thy sword, with thy arrow,
Quickly, fly like a sparrow,
Hurry, go 'fore it's too late,
Go now, for we cannot wait~

The sword approaches, arrows fly,
The word is screamed, and people try,
Tears they fall, and blood is shed,
Fear grows hastily, hate is spread~

Help us Gods, or we may fall,
Hear our call, before it ends us all,
Do not run, and do not fear,
For the sword and arrow, they are near~

kkthxbye Eh sorry about that, pieced that together in five minutes before going to bed. Oh well, thanks for the revision~

Storm Crow

Desert Nomad

Join Date: Jul 2005

With Vanatiel by the Lion's Arch Lighthouse, waiting for the storm with which we are accoustomed

Children of the Order [CoO] -True Heroes Fight to Keep the Balance-

18 Dec 2005 at 19:55 - 6

Thanks, Claire! I usually don't get very good comments after rewriting somone else's works ^^

Symeon

Forge Runner

Join Date: Jul 2005

19 Dec 2005 at 08:45 - 7

Quote:
Originally Posted by Storm Crow
Thanks, Claire! I usually don't get very good comments after rewriting somone else's works ^^ If you have the time to 'rewrite', why don't you use some of that time to...'newrite' I'd compliment you if you did that

ownage of teh elite

Lion's Arch Merchant

Join Date: Jun 2005

Paradise =)

N/Me

26 Dec 2005 at 22:38 - 8

Quote:
Originally Posted by King Symeon
If you have the time to 'rewrite', why don't you use some of that time to...'newrite' I'd compliment you if you did that

megalomaniac_mutant

Lion's Arch Merchant

Join Date: Dec 2005

End of the Universe

My guild name not know you must.

27 Dec 2005 at 12:11 - 9

nice